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Divorce Journaling and Affirmations

The following Affirmations and Thoughts are excerpted from The Divorce Recovery Journal . Each excerpt contains a thought provoking Quotation, an Affirmation, Our Thoughts and Your Thoughts.

Expectations

You get what you expect
Venus Veritas

Affirmation

I appreciate the happy events in my day, especially the small ones, and share them with others.

Our Thoughts

It's easy to become negative during a divorce because there is so much about the process that's disturbing and wrenching. Don't get in the habit of expecting everything to be bad. Go hang out with your friends and join in the laughter. Let yourself be swept up in the fun and funny stuff, and allow yourself to forget your drama for a while. Afterward, go home and get a good nights sleep. If you're having trouble sleeping, consult with your health practitioner for either prescription or natural remedies, or talk to your divorce counselor. Don't neglect laughter and sleep.

Your Thoughts

Have I become negative in my outlook?

Relaxation

Living is entirely too time-consuming.
Irene Peter

Affirmation

I often stop and look for shapes in clouds.

Our Thoughts

The long process of divorce has a way of devouring all the hours of your week. You're so intent upon the next meeting with the attorney, or the court date, or that brand new mortgage payment that before you know it, the year's half gone. Every once in awhile, reclaim the here and now by gazing at the tree branches against the blue and clouded sky, or bending to feel the velvet of the rose petals. Take a few slow, deep breaths along the way, and you'll feel centered again in real life.

Your Thoughts

What will be my own version of stopping to smell the roses?

Planning

It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.
Howard Ruff

Affirmation

I make concrete plans to prepare myself and my home for the changes of season.

Our Thoughts

Preparation is a great stress reducer! It's having the furnace checked before cold weather hits, getting your taxes done before the Ides of April, or catching up with the laundry. An ounce of preparation will help you avoid a ton of troublesome moments.

Your Thoughts

What seasonal preparations do I want to mark on my calendar?

Humor

Start off every day with a smile and get it over with.
W. C. Fields

Affirmation

Knowing that laughter is an essential part if a healthy life, I spend as much time as possible with good humored friends.

Our Thoughts

There will be days when you feel as irascible as W. C. Fields. For some, time out is healing. A retreat into music, books, TV or other at-home relaxation may be just the ticket. For others, spending time with a particularly supportive friend may help take away the crankiness.

Your Thoughts

What jump-starts my spirits?

Change

Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
Susan Ert

Affirmation

I take joy in exploring new pleasures and activities I never had time to try before.

Our Thoughts

The married state develops a routine and life of its own. Many find themselves at a loss when they are suddenly on their own with their routines changed or in some cases gone altogether. If you are at a loss over what to do with yourself, start thinking about all those things that you wanted to do when you were a twosome but didn't have time for. Now is the time.

Your Thoughts

What did I always want to do, but never had time for? What did I always want to do, but never had time for?

Patience

Lord, give me patience -- and hurry!
George Robinson Ragsdale

Affirmation

I will savor each day without being unduly impatient for the next.

Our Thoughts

Some people are lucky and have rapid and polite divorces. Others (probably the majority) have divorces that range from mildly annoying to an experience that rivals the seventh level of Hell. If you are anywhere on the continuum of annoying to Hell, you no doubt have the patience of a gnat. Hang on. Do what you have to do to ungrit those teeth. Deliverance is at hand.

Your Thoughts

Am I impatient?

Strength

We are what we pretend to be.
Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

Affirmation

I am always stronger today than I was yesterday.

Our Thoughts

Personal pride straightens our shoulders, lifts our chins, and helps us to create a make-believe appearance of confidence and strength. It's a bit defiant. It says don't pity me. It says I'm strong. And for now maybe it's lying, but the more you act the part, the closer you'll be to feeling it -- and becoming it. Fake it 'til you make it!

Self-Esteem

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.
Childhood Rhyme

Affirmation

I am as deserving of respect as everyone else is.

Our Thoughts

Dare to express your own true thoughts, no matter what conventional wisdom tells you, and no matter what names people may affix upon you for doing so. Getting through a divorce without being called hateful names is distinctly unlikely. Develop a thicker skin, and know that you will survive.

Your Thoughts

Do I know how to stand up for myself?

Your Thoughts

What positive mantra or phrase can I repeat to myself when I need to boost my morale?

Change

The past must no longer be used as an anvil for beating out the present and the future.
Paul-Emile Borduas

Affirmation

I will try something new, large or small, every day.

Our Thoughts

How often do you fashion today's and tomorrow's plans on what you did a decade ago? Do you order mint chocolate chip ice cream simply because you always have? Do you check the want ads under Sales just because you've worked in sales? Now is the time to try on new ideas. Taste them, roll them around in your mouth, feel how they would fit into your new life. This is the time for fresh starts.

Your Thoughts

In what areas, large and small, can I spread my wings and experiment with change?

Related Articles

How to Use Journaling in Divorce Survival and Recovery

Meet Mary Stuart M.A., Co-Author of the Divorce Recovery Journal

Table of Contents, Divorce Recovery Journal

Other Resources

Links to Other Web Sites

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