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Second Time Around
Question
My x wife left me for the 2nd time but this time she said she loves me, but I'm changing too slowly. How can I move on with my life when she said that? Was married for 13 yrs til she asked for the divorce -- 1 1/2 later she was sorry. That's when I decided, ok she wants back maybe this time it is for good.
Answer
That does make it tough for you. I'm a little confused about whether she wants to come back, or just said she loves you as she left for the second time. She's probably not sending you mixed signals. Indeed, she may always love you, but her love has changed, and she may still have to leave the marriage.
A counselor can help you work through the confusion and accept the end of your marriage. You can't move on with your life until that happens. In time you'll be able to look back and remember the good times as well as the pain.
If she does want to return to the marriage, make joint counseling a condition for her return. You can't continue the emotional roller coaster ride of her jumping in and out of your life.
~ Linda Senn
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